"You can't take a picture of this. It's already gone."

Friday, June 14, 2013

Only in Dreams Do things work out

Unless they are my dreams
which have recently featured
a great deal of blood and fear

Some days are harder than others
for instance
I got a message yesterday
that said

Once a whore always a whore! Not only are you a fucking cow you also have no integrity or loyalty and you deserve every pound of your morbid obesity you slimy scum of the Earth!!!!

As you might imagine,
this is fascinating to me. 
At first it was ugly and made
me very very angry
especially after seeing that I was 
not the only person in my family to 
receive such a message. It helped 
because it allowed me to pinpoint who
sends such things online.
 And now I know.
And after talking to a few friends
I still have no idea
of the why. And it pains me
and I don't know why.
As it turns out, I have not completely
divorced myself from giving a shit
what other people think.

It isn't nice to call people names
or try and mess with their relationships
and family.
It isn't very nice
at all.

I swear I'll stop obsessing about this soon

In the words of Veronica Mars
"We used to be friends, a long time ago."
and to be honest
those words
haunt me.

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