"You can't take a picture of this. It's already gone."

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Hate, Mercy and Weddings----the crazy that lives in my mind

I've been reading posts over at Four Times The Fun and on reading the comments about another blog (not linking up, you can find it over there, under lunatic watch), I have concluded there are some very scary people in this world.

"The same principle applies to charitable acts of kindness, which I'm guessing is the value that parents are trying to instill when they teach their children to "share". What they are really teaching them is Communism" <------this is from the actual blog. WHAT THE EFF?

Also, apparently there are whole christian movements who think that women should have as many children as possible (Quiverfull Movement) and submit wholly to their husbands(as in literal kitchen and bedroom only, don't vote and homeschool the kids) and still others who think that daughters should not be college educated. IVF is evil, homos are evil, divorce is always wrong.

I find these beliefs deeply disturbing. I am a 19 year old parent of twins. I do NOT always agree with my fiance or my father and it doesn't make me evil or bad (just irritating). I don't always wear the most modest clothes but I'm not sexually promiscuous, I never have been. I think that divorce is a necessary evil and I think there are definitely circumstances that make it okay. I also think that while getting to know your partner is an integral part of getting married, I also think that people can hide the bad parts of themselves really well and I also believe that people change and not always for the better.

I think that our God is a merciful God and that His love and mercy covers depths that we cannot even describe or understand. "Forgive them, Lord, for they know not what they do". Forgiveness goes beyond repentance. Love goes beyond sin. So when I hear that someone is going to hell, or that their in hell, I understand the sentiment, but we don't know how far a loving God's mercy extends. And I'm greatful for that. So, I'll do my best not to condemn anyone with my words and instead, maybe, show mercy that my Father shows me.

I went to college, I fully plan on going back. I can't wait to go back to school and work, but I also fully plan on making sure my kids get a good education, are well fed, feel loved and disciplined. I plan on playing with them as much as I can, and teaching them what I can and what I know and have learned over my years.

I plan on continuing to be a good mommy but also to continue being Megan as much as I can. I think that's one of the hardest parts of my life right now, trying to be me in the midst of organizing and being mom and planning and trying to be what everyone wants me to be. That mixed with all the various traumas I've either been put through or have put myself through are making me a little wacky and making it harder to find the megan through the various other jobs and personas. I also feel the happiest I've ever been these days. I want to get married. I have all these ambitions and I'm dying to get started and I feel like the road is beckoning me the further I walk upon it. I can't wait.

1 comment:

  1. Sounds like you are juggling things well--good to read about ambitions and dreams rather than other blogger who enjoy complaining.